Review #135: Critters (1986)

Cast/Notable Credits:
Stephen Herek (Director): Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure (1989), Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead (1991), The Mighty Ducks (1992), The Three Musketeers (1993), Mr. Holland’s Opus (1995), 101 Dalmatians (1996), Rock Star (2001), Man of the House (2005)

Dee Wallace (Helen): The Howling

M.Emmet Walsh (Harv): Blade Runner (1982), Missing in Action (1984), Fletch (1985), Wildcats (1986), Back to School (1986), Raising Arizona (1987), Harry and the Hendersons (1987), Snow Dogs (2002)

Billy Green Bush (Jay Brown): Friday Part 9

Scott Grimes (Brad): Critters 2, Mystery, Alaska (1999), Party of Five, Band of Brothers, ER & American Dad T.V. series

Nadine Van der Velde (April): Private School (1983), Munchies (1987)

Don Keith Opper (Charlie): Critters 2, 3, 4, Ghost in the Machine (1993)

Terrance Mann (Ug): Critters 2, 3, 4

Billy Zane (Steve Elliot): Back to the Future (1985) & 2 (1989), T.F.T.C.: Demon Knight (1995), The Phantom (1996), Titanic (1997), BloodRayne (2005)

Ethan Phillips (Jeff Barnes): The Shadow (1994), Wagons East (1994), Bad Santa (2003), The Island (2005), Star Trek Voyager & Benson T.V. series

Lin Shaye (Sally)

Michael Lee Gogin (Warden Zanti): Munchies, Spy Hard (1986), Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998), Epic Movie (2007)

Trailer:


Plot:

Alien prisoners (Crites) escape from a maximum security space prison on an asteroid and land on Earth to take refuge, hide…and eat. Shortly afterwards, the prison warden dispatches two bounty hunters to recover the fugitive Crites.

The bounty hunters are another alien species that are human like in form with blank lime green heads. By staring at images, they are able to transform their blank faces into the images they see. Kind of like early green screen eh? One of them transforms its looks into a famous Earth rock star named Johnny Steele by watching a video of him sing the film’s main song, “Power of the Night”.

The Crites have landed on the Brown’s family farm in a rural town called Grover’s Bend in Kansas. The Crites attack the family at night and they shelter themselves in their farmhouse. The family must fight off the Crites before they become their next course.

Meanwhile the bounty hunters have landed in Grover’s Bend and have been looking for the Crites. The second bounty hunter has had trouble finding itself a “face” and takes on various towns’ folk faces before landing on the look of the crazy town’s drunk, Charlie.

The Brown family’s youngest son, Brad, escapes the Crites and flees the homestead in an effort to bring back help. While running down the road, Brad encounters the bounty hunters and leads them back to his house to free his family and defeat the Crites.

Villain:

The Crites. I think everyone knows what these little guys look like, but if you don't think of Sonic the Hedgehog, or a bear trap with a mullet, hands and feet. The Crites, or Critters, are little balls of fur the size of a basketball when rolled up or a garden gnome when standing. They have beady red eyes and razor sharp teeth. The Crites LOVE to feed on things. Their black fur acts as a defense mechanism as they are able to shoot out poisonous little hair darts from their hides.

The Crites also have their own distinct alien language as they communicate with each other during attacks. They were little smart *ss killers, which was a nice touch to the personality of their species.

Cast:

The cast of the film is a pretty honored cast. There are many actors and actresses who worked on this film that had distinguished careers. Dee Wallace played the Brown family’s mother. She is a veteran of the movie industry. Her role was a poor man’s version of the character she played in E.T.

The town’s sheriff was played by M. Emmet Walsh (Pictured Left), another journey man Hollywood actor. Walsh’s fellow police force includes Lin Shaye (his secretary) and Ethan Phillips (his deputy). Phillips is probably known best for his role as Neelix in the T.V. series Star Trek: Voyager. Shaye is no stranger to the horror industry as she has popped up in many films over the years.

Critters was one of Billy Zane’s first featured films. He played the character of Steve Elliott, April Brown’s boyfriend from NY. Zane was honored enough to be one of the few victims in the film.

SFX/Gore:

Overall, Critters wasn’t a really bloody or gory film from the body count stand point. Only two humans actually died in the film, but there were many Crites getting blown to sh*t.

Critters offered pretty good SFX for being a mid 80’s flick. The effects specialized in the transformation sequence of the alien bounty hunters. Also had good effects for the laser cannons the bounty hunters supported.

The Critters themselves were a pretty decent achievement in the SFX division. They seemed to be a blend between hand puppets and remote controlled balls at times. When the Critters were on their feet, I believe they were just highly designed hand puppets. When they were mobile and in ball form, they were either remote controlled, or just rolled on the ground.

TNA:

Dee Wallace and Nadine Van der Velde (Shark Factors) showcase the film’s TNA portion. If you remember, Wallace is the loving mom from E.T. and reprises a similar role to the Brown family. Her daughter is Van der Velde (Pictured Right), who plays an over exuberant sex charged high schooler named April.

T.Gun Factor:

Critters is one of those lovable, cheesy 80’s sci-fi horror movies that I grew up with. It is a classic in my book. Critters was done with enough class and budget to keep it out of my list of “crappy” movies. It was nothing fancy or special, and could be skewed as a Gremlin rip-off, but it has burned a little hole in the warm spot of my heart. I liked the idea of little aliens causing havoc on a family who lives in rural an isolated farmhouse.

Critters IS a cheesy ball fest. What else would you expect from the man who brought us Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure and Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead? It’s borderline tongue and cheek, yet it takes itself very seriously. I would classify it as more of a Sci-Fi film than an entry in the horror industry, but it’s both.

Here’s a taste of the horrible lyrics to the films *cough * main song, Johnny Steele’s “Power of the Night”: ♫ A google search of this song's title came up with the band, Savatage. Ever heard of it?

Johnny Steele’s Power of the Night
♫ Nighttime’s on fire ♫
♫ We are the heat ♫
♫ The flame is desire ♫
♫ Burns in the seat ♫
♫ Know it’s going to strike ♫
♫ Again and again ♫
♫ Hold on to the night ♫
♫ Hold on to the end ♫
♫ It’s the Power of the Night ♫
♫ Streets are calling ♫
♫ Stealing from the light ♫
♫ Shadow’s falling ♫
♫ It’s the Power of the Night ♫
♫ Streets are calling ♫
♫ Power of… ♫
♫ …the Night ♫

Misc. Movie Trivia:
-Film opened on April 11, 1986 and made $13.1 million at the Box Office ($1.6 million opening weekend)
-Corey Burton is the voice of the Critters. Also contributed his voice for the cartoons of Transformers (Spike), G.I. Joe (Tomax), Star Wars: The Clone Wars (Count Dooku)